Blog posts from various other contributors
If you’re a die-hard sports fan, there’s nothing you love more than staying abreast of developments in the league, from top to bottom. [Kiu] had a family member that was big into NFL, so set about building them a remarkably cool ladder tracker. The tracker displays the NFL league table with a ten-minute delay, thanks […]
Cute NFL Standings Tracker Uses Little Mini Helmets — Hackaday
I’m sitting here bored as shit because I got the ‘vid. Everyone knows I had an illustrious streak of negative test after negative test. Everyone knows this. In the nearly two years since the virus came in like a wrecking ball I’ve had that swab suck up my lil nostrils countless times. Always negative. Then January 19, 2021 happens. All good streaks must come to an end. Just look up what happened on July 17, 1941.
“If you weren’t thinking you wouldn’t have thought that” – Michael “Squints” Palledorous. I find that throwaway line from “The Sandlot” incredibly profound. I legitimately say it to myself often when I find myself getting stressed out by things I can’t immediately fix. I’ve got a lot of adult things to worry about, like work and shit with my car, so spending several days alone isn’t great for the old brain department. Therefore, the healthiest thing I can do is think about fantasy football. And, boy, while locked up the last few days, I’ve been doing a lot of that.
All the fantasy content folks are ripping off their ice cold takes about the upcoming fantasy season, despite the fact the ’21 NFL season is still underway! Crazy! I bet the majority of the people think they’re spewing nonsense to get clicks because fantasy draft szn is seven months away. So much can change between now and then! Truly the worst types of clickbaiters. With that in mind, here at MustBeSunday.com we are so three-thousand-and-eight and all the other guys are so two-thousand-and-late. So, fuck it, here’s my projected 2023 first round for The League.
2. Abie. It seems like Abie is always in the back end of the middle picks. When I think of Abie I think of the sixth pick. Well, luckily for our guy Abie Bobby Lashley came through for him in the rumble, finishing in second place, getting thrown out of the ring by Umaga, Brad’s character. Abie opts for the second pick and selects none other than Derick Henry. The Last Dance. This will be his eighth season of an unforgettable career. Unfortunately for Abie in the ’21 season the King missed the final nine games of the year. Could this be the rest needed to give him some extra juice? Maybe! I’m always a glass half full guy. The Titans lead back is clearly going to play a big role next year, playing well enough to give Abie a reason to grab him with the second pick overall. Will the machine handle yet another massive workload in what will be year eight?
3. Because of Kofi Kingston, Andrew is going to have a choice at what pick he wants and it’s going to take him forever and then he’s going to go, “you know what fine alright fuck it I hate it but, oh my god, I’m gonna do it, I’m gonna take the third pick … FUCK!” Then he’s going to draft Najee Harris. Najee Harris had the rookie year that people thought CEH was going to have in ’20. I think people were actually a bit higher on CEH, but, still, Najee clearly was the best rookie going into the season and he certainly played like it. He finished RB4! On a horrible team! Nice. I don’t know if the Steelers are going to be much better come 2023, but year three Najee is going to be a problem.
4. Brent is going to pick right behind Andrew and it’s going to be a thing we hear about everyday in the six week period between the rumble and the draft. Andrew is going to talk shit and Brent is going to send his butterfly emjois. We all know this. Some things don’t change. One thing, however, that will have changed between now and then is Brent is going into the ’23 season fresh off a last place finish. What?! Javtone Williams of the Denver Broncos. Williams finished as RB17 this past year. Very solid, especially for a rookie. In ’22 he’s gonna make the leap over our old nemesis Melvin and further grow into that dude. He put up nice numbers despite only scoring four touchdowns in ’21. Rumor is the Broncos are looking to bring in a big time QB, someone who may be married to an RnB singer who is currently on the Seattle Seahawks. You may need to do some mental gymnastics to figure out who I’m talking about, but once you do, you’ll see why that’s huge for Williams. People make football far more complicated than it needs to be. Good offenses score more touchdowns. A better QB in Denver will make their offense better and therefore score more touchdowns. Javonte Williams will score some of those touchdowns. Easy pick. Nice one, Abie.
5. Tommy Bonez, you’re on the clock! We all know this guy loves Austin Ekeler. Austin Ekler this, Austin Ekler that, etc, etc. Ekeler proved his worth by having a dominating ’21 campaign, finished RB2 overall. Will he produce enough in 2022 to justify being a top five pick? You bet! Really good running back! This will be the third year in a row Thomas drafts Ekeler in the first round and by January 2024 they are real life friends which is sweet because I’ve never been friends with someone who is friends with a pro athlete before and that’s a cool thing to tell people.
6. Beans Corp. I’m going to draft Alvin Kamara . I will act confident, but die on the inside because I actually wanted to draft DeAndre Swift. I’m going Kamara solely on name which is DUMB drafting! Idiot! However, despite the fact the Saints have turned into one of the weirdest teams in football, Kamara is an asset and will still be first-round-worthy 21 months from now.
7. Jack takes DeAndre Swift and I shed a single tear because that’s the right pick here. 7th pick overall? I mean obviously. Jack drafts well. We all know this. Gotta take fourth year Swift here. I don’t think it’s a ridiculously scorching take to say the Lions are likely to be better in 2023. They have to be. In 2022 Swift is going to face the defenses of the Jaguars, Jets, Giants and Seahawks. Will be huge for his season totals. Clear first rounder going into ’23.
8. Where will Max be drafting from come 2023? I sure hope it’s with us in person, but who knows. Since we’re predicting things, I’m going to guess he will be in Charlottee, North Carolina. Moving in the overall direction of Bristol, kid. Max is going to fuck with us and act like he’s going to take Mike Williams to the point where we start to believe him and scramble through The League rules about the proper procedure to invoke the 25th Amendment. Just when he has us getting ready to attack he takes Joe Mixon. So boring omfg. Such a fantasy football guy. Seems like he’s been around for fifteen years. Joe is going to build upon his amazing ’21 campaign next year and prove he is first round material. Still, so boring.
9. Kris was the ninth pick in 2019 when I was the tenth. That was a fun draft. That was a fun time. Until the Uber to White Plains Debacle of 2021. “I would die for my boys to go to White Plains! You’re not even advocating for me to go!” Anyway, Kris takes Ja’Maar Chase here. I mean, this is obvious, right? You’re watching Kris sipping on Moon Rock Hard Seltzer or whatever we are drinking in 2023. He slowly approaches the draft board and, what’s this?!?!?! He is looking through the wide receiver pile! It then takes him fifteen minutes to realize that Chase’s name isn’t in there because half of the kit came with stickers for players who retired in 2015. He writes Ja’Maar out on a blank sticker and places it on the board at #9. Kris then locks eyes with me and makes that face he does during drafts when he’s fake nervous and excited. Maybe he really is nervous. I’m not sure. I don’t want to know. Absolute wildcard.
10. Ryan takes rookie running back Bijan Robinson out of Texas who will be drafted by the Seatle Seahawks
Yeah there’s some big names not going in the first round. CMC? Fool us once, shame on you, shame on you, fool us twice, shame on me, fool us a third time, shame on whoever drafts him in ’22. No way does this man go in the first round. Barkley? Didn’t even think of his name until now. Zeke? It pains me to say, but no. He had a really good fantasy year in ’21, but man, he’s slowing down, huh? “Oh but uhhh Cooper Kupp just had one of the best fantasy seasons ever!” – you. “Yeah he did, but he is not going to come close to that in ’22 and as a result people will be scared to take him in the first round. Relax, I’m sure he will go in the second.” – me. Deebo Samuel? T Hill? Devante Adams? Justin Jefferson? Relax, we are a ten person league. Don’t reach. You all know better.
Folks, I will see you in 2023! I’m sure I will be pulling up to the Vignali’s house on a flying car like it’s the goddamn Jetsons. Regardless of how I got there, I know I’ll be walking home. Go League. Go 2023.
The NFL trade deadline is a few days a way. Yay. I guess. The NFL deadline is traditionally, by far, the most boring in all of sports. The week leading up to the deadlines in the MLB and NBA are jampacked with wild rumors and actual action. Remember, Scherzer confirmed to San Diego only to get shipped off to their rivals in LA? Wild! NFL – eh not so much. However, we can make the trade deadline a bit more fun when analyzing the fantasy implications of potential moves. Let’s get into it!
The first player that should be discussed is Allen Robinson II. Free this man! The Bears stink and he’s had pretty piss poor QB’s throwing to him his whole career. Blake Bortles, Chad Henne, Mitch Trubisky and Nick Foles. Not exactly Murderers Row. Although they sure murdered the golden years of his career. ZING! Kris drafted ARob in the third round this year and, to put it mildly, hasn’t been worth that high of a pick. He is WR60 averaging a horrid 6.1 points a game. Robinson hasn’t scored more than ten points in a game yet this season. Surprisingly, he scored one touchdown in week 2. He only has double digits targets in one game and that was week one with frienemy of the company Andy Dalton slinging him the rock.
Where could Robinson find himself come next Wednesday morning? The Raider’s make some sense. Robinson would find himself leading a receiving core that would also be composed of Henry Ruggs, Hunter Renfrow and Bryan Edwards. Tight End Darren Waller is, of course, a major pass catcher for Las Vegas as well. Derick Carr would also certainly be the best quarterback ever throwing to the guy. That’s rough!
Henry Ruggs and Hunter Renfrow, rostered by Marzy and Abie, are the same player. They are WR’s 29 and 30 respectively. Both have two touchdowns in two different games. I have no doubt in my mind that Bryan Edwards is a nice guy but he isn’t fantasy relevant so I ain’t looking shit up about him, chief. Waller, who is now on Team Bones, is a huge name but has been rather quiet since a monster week 1. He too has found the end zone twice. A lot of things happen in Vegas – gamblin’, concerts, running into Mike Tyson, etc. Receiving touchdowns ain’t one of those things. Not that this means much – but only 2 of the 6 previously discussed touchdowns occurred during a home game! What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas?
Throw Allen Robinson in the mix and what happens? Robinson’s value HAS to go up because it really can’t get any worse. On the flip side, it’ll take away looks from the three current Raiders we discussed. The biggest impact could be Thomas as he just traded for Waller. A couple more bad weeks and Waller will no longer be in the top 10 TE’s. We are a ten team league so analyze that how you will. We didn’t touch upon them, but Josh Jacobs and Kenyan Drake are also big pieces to the Raiders offense. Jacobs has five rushing touchdowns so far this season. Robinson will make the offense all the more dynamic and being able to get down easier into the red zone will simply lead to more Josh Jacobs touchdowns as the team clearly likes for him to rush it in as opposed to throwing it. Good news for Andrew as he looks to solidify himself as a top dawg in The League yet again. To summarize – good for Kris and Andrew. Bad for Ryan and Abie.
The Raiders are not the only possibility for Robinson! There are some common phrases / life rules that everyone knows -treat others how you want to be treated, look both ways before crossing the street and, of course, don’t draft anyone on the Ravens except Lamar Jackson and Mark Andrews and I guess now Hollywood Brown. And what a compliment to Brown would Robinson be! Hollywood is currently rostered by Thomas. The Bone Man has enjoyed six touchdowns from Brown. Yes, that is as many touchdowns as Ruggs, Renfrow and Waller combined. I can do that math in my head! He’s WR6, can you believe that? Mark Andrew, on Marzy’s squad, is also extremely fantasy relevant. He’s currently TE2 averaging 13.6 points a week; however, he has one 36 point week, so take that average for what it’s worth. That game, in week 5, is the only one where he’s received double digit targets. HMMMMM. I think it’s clear that Robinson to the Ravens would be huge for Kris. Not great for Ryan. Not the best for Thomas either. Or is it?
How could I forget – Tommy Sweet Tooth has Lamar Jackson, DUH! Lamar has 10 passing and 2 rushing touchdowns through 6 games this season. Those passing touchdowns ain’t great. He has less than Teddy Bridgewater and Carson Wentz. Yuck! Yet, Lamar is still QB4 on the year. Adding in Robinson would almost surely see those numbers balloon. That’s an expression, right? So, to conclude, this trade would be HUGE for Kris and Thomas. I would get into the impact on running backs, but like my fantasy team, the Ravens are on the DEEP end of their RB depth chart after some heartbreaking injuries.
The block is hot with rumors that the Packers are shopping for a WR. Could the Bears make a trade to their historic rival? Hey, the Yankees and Red Sox traded with each other last year when Boston got Adam Ottavino and like eight years ago when the Yanks were dealt Stephen Drew. It’s not the craziest thing! Also, Robinson is a free agent at the end of the year, so who’s to say the Pack will re-sign him and will go on to torture the Bears for the next few years anyway? Well, I wouldn’t count on it. The two teams haven’t made a trade since 1999. As fun as it would be for Robinson to have Aaron Rodgers throwing to him, I don’t think this one happens.
You know who is, FOR SURE, going up to Green Bay? My main man Brandin Cooks. Another guy who needs to be freed from a very unfortunate situation. The Texans big time STINK. He recently expressed major frustration on twitter after Houston dealt veteran RB Mark Ingram to the Saints for a second stint in NOLA. Luckily for Brandin Cooks he is constantly getting traded. To recap his career – he was drafted by the Saints, traded to the Patriots for one year where he was traded to the Rams for two years where he was then traded to his current home in Houston. Wow – he joined the Pats for the 2017 season when they lost in the Super Bowl to the Eagles, then traded to the Rams who went on to lose the big game to the Patriots. Tough luck! He hasn’t been close to the promise land in Texas. He will get a shot at losing in the Super Bowl, or at least the Conference Championship game, in Green Bay.
Aaron Rodgers is better than Davis Mills. He is also better than Tyord Taylor. I do not need to expand upon that. Devante Adams is better than Brandin Cooks. I do not need to expand upon that, but for the sake of the article I should. Cooks is the guy in Houston. Like, he’s literally the only professional football player on the team. He is absolutely going to play second fiddle to Adams. Regardless, I like this move for Cooks fantasy value. The Packers are going to have the ball longer than the Texans will each game. Despite taking a step back in terms of his role to the offense, Cooks will find himself in a nice position. He will certainly be happier.
Like he often is in the National Football League, he was just traded in The League. Brent now proudly rosters Mr. Cooks after acquiring him from the comish. Brandin Cooks is a nice bench piece for Brent. If Cooper continues to sort of stink or if AJ Brown gets food poisoning again Cooks catching passes from Rodgers is a real nice option to have. I think Adams is so good that he won’t lost many targets, if anything Cooks better than Lazard and MVS, so Adams may have more red zone looks coming his way. Nice for Kris! Also nice for Kris is Aaron Jones will be in a slightly better offensive scheme. Maybe he gets a reception or two less? I wouldn’t worry about it. Also good for me as I am back on my bullshit with David Johnson. He will be the only recognizable player on this team once Cooks is outta town. Considering the Astros are about to lose the World Series, it’s a tough time to be a Houston sports fan.
While we are discussing the Texans and the NFL trade deadline how could I not write about Deshaun Watson? The most prominent trade rumor of the season has been him getting shipped off to Miami in exchange for Tua. Watson has not played a snap thus far in 2020. I believe he technically can be playing right now, but for obvious reasons it’s not the best look to let him on the field, to put it lightly. If he does get traded to Miami someone will pick him up. It won’t be Beans Corp, but someone will. While the Miami offense is unwatchable, this move would have some fantasy implications. There’s so much ugly shit out there with this guy that is sucks to have to seemingly dismiss it and just talk fantasy, but for the sake of the article I will do it quickly. Assuming he plays close to form, it’s good for anyone who rosters anyone on Miami. Brad with Waddle, Andrew with Mike G, Kris with Gaskin. Ugly situation in real life. Finally, not to beat a dead horse, but, especially without Cooks, Tua loses any fantasy small fantasy relevance he has by getting shipped to Houston. He’s not rostered by anyone now, but he is sometimes mentioned as a somewhat viable streamer.
That’s all I got. Defenders are going to be moved, but I do not have capacity to examine how that impacts D/ST’s. I’m signing off. Lets see what happens come 4:00 pm Tuesday! Go League!
P.S – Isn’t it weird Allen Robinson and Brandin Cooks were drafted in the same year? Cooks seems sooooo much older. Weird!
Today is two years from the first documented use of “Must Be Sunday” according to my Timehop! While the phrase itself may only be two years old, the meaning behind those three simple words has existed among human beings for ages. Or at least since the NFL’s founding in 1920.
To make a short story even shorter – a number of members of The League were watching Sunday football, as we do. I took a snapchat video of the crew watching, bantering and bartering, etc, and and captioned it “Must Be Sunday.” When future students are studying the rise and fall of the American empire they will write a DBQ (document based question, I think?, for you non New York public school educated readers) comparing this moment to the signing of the Declaration of Independence. The only difference is I don’t know how to write in script.
The time stamp says 5:03 pm. According to the old google machine – there were two games on during this slate on this historical day – the 7-9 Raiders in Houston to face the 10-6 Texans and the 6-10 Browns facing the 12-4 Patriots. What an old fashion sentence! Things done changed. I imagine we were watching the Texans game because my QB1 that year was the now seemingly bad-guy Deshaun Watson.
What a day for football this was! The 3-5 Chargers visited the 3-4 Bears and, naturally, the Bears, lost 17-16 on a last second missed Eddy Pineiro missed field goal. Total Bears move. We probably laughed a lot. I don’t remember. Sounds fund. The 4-12 Giants lost to the 3-3-1 Lions 31-26. Ooooffff! I must’ve loved this one. Don’t let the score fool you. The G-Men scored a garbage time touchdown to get to 26. Love it. Boring game, but for the sake of New York fandom, the 1-6 Jets lost to the 4-4 Jaguars 29-15. Minshew Mania, baby! Old reliable Adam Vinateri delivered an end-of-game field goal to deliver a 15-13 victory for the 5-2 Colts over the 2-6 Broncos. Although by the time the primetime game was on we probably all crawled out of the Vignali’s house like basement people to go see our families and drink water it was a marquee matchup that I’m sure we were excited about. The 7-1 Packers against the 5-3 Chiefs. Wow! Packers won 31-24. Major fantasy implications in this game!
On that note, lets discuss what happened in The League on the day of our nations founding. Beans Corp faced Country Roads, Take Mahomes AKA Kris. I needed this one but I didn’t get it despite good performances from Watson, Marlon Mack and JuJu. Again, what an old fashioned sentence! Derrick Henry only got me 6.7. 2021 DH would never dog me like that. My sworn enemy / life partner Robby Anderson gave me 6.3 because obviously. Just obviously. What a joke. Despite the hot start for David Johnson that year this was when he was either injured or just stopped playing football as he was on my bench with a goose egg. For some reason Jacoby Brissett was also on my bench. Kris’ team honestly had a mediocre showing but I got Julio’d and Patriots D/ST’d to death as both scored 20 points. Buns! I lost 112.7 – 110.9. BRUTAL! Because it is pre-2020 Kris had Todd Gurley, although he only put up 10 points. Jamison Crowder and Carlos Hyde were out there battling for Kris. He also had Darrel Henderson before it was cool, although he was riding the bench this week. Also on the bench was Miles Sanders who put up 21.3 points. My eyes burned when I read that as I roster the Eagles back this year. Nightmares!
Everybody Hates Kris aka Andrew faced Here’s To You, Mr. Robinson (Jack). I wonder if they knew that two years into the future they would be sharing a bathroom in the big city. The champ before he was the champ that year put up a monster 144.9 to Jack’s 125.1. For some inexplixable reason Andrew started rookie Daniel Jones, but it greatly paid off as he put up a rock solid 28. Andrew also naturally had a huge week from McCaffrey and an awesome 25 points from Edelman. Nice! Some old school names on Andrew’s roster include Philip Lindsay at RB2 and Duke Johnson on the bench. “Duke Johnson? Duke Johnson?” You know the rest. Jack came up short despite 36 points (!) from Tevin Coleman and 18 points from 49ers D/ST against Carolina. A measly 10 points from Kyler. Ugly! Jack started Tarik Cohen and Kerryon Johnson. How was this only two years ago?
Baby Chark Doo Doo Doo aka Lebron beat HockeyPro69 aka Abie 137.2 – 113.1. Lebron enjoyed rock solid performances from Aaron Jones, James Conner and his team’s namesake DJ Chark. Also, Steelers D/ST dropped 15 points against Miami. Seems like a monster week for defenses. Leveon Bell had a horrible week for Lebron. Man, he has been so far from fantasy relevance. Lebron also gave scary Terry the start before he became truly scary. for so long now! I need to list Abie’s roster because it is SO 2019! Aaron Rodgers, Leondard Fournette, Jordan Howard, Michael Thomas, OBJ, DeDe Westbrook, Gerald Everett, Seahawks D/ST & Zane Gonzalez. Oh man, what a trip down memory lane. I genuinely haven’t thought about Jordan Howard or DeDe Westbrook in two years. I remember it was a thing on the pod that only Zane Gonzalez was good on Abie’s team that year. That held true this week as he dropped 11 points. Rodgers and Michael Thomas did well too. However, DeDe dropped a big fat goose egg. Classic!
Now We Cookin’ (Max) v. Baker MaySUCK (Ryan) was a true classic. Max dropped 189.3! What?! Ryan dropped a weak 94. Yikes! Ha – Max had Barkley, Dalvin Cook AND Ekeler. The first two combined for 49.9. Ekeler a meek 9.2. Aside from Robbie Gould who put up 9, Austin E is the only player who was in single digits! Yet another big week from a defense, as the Vikings dropped 13. Kenny G and Cooper Kupp scored 25.3 and 31.5, respectively. That halfway foreshadowed things to come. You know what’s happening with them this year. Ryan got 15.8 from Minseota Viking Stefon Diggs. Nothing else went right. Philip Rivers got the start and put up 10. Devonta Freeman gave Ryan 12. DeSean Jackson was on Ryan’s bench. Throwback!
Finally, The Flandrew’s (Brent) lost to Abraham Leider: Vampire Hunter (Alex). Our former member Alex needed this one. This was the year he kept scoring a lot but just couldn’t find a W. Luckily for him, Brent shit the bed this week and couldn’t crack 100. Alex won 137.8 – 99.9. Brent’s team has some current starters – Hopkins, Carson, Godwin and Waller. He also started Ty Johnson and Goff. Funny! You know what’s even funnier – Alex started MASON RUDOLPH. He also started Frank Gore. Gotta respect that. This was also the days of John Brown getting fantasy starts. Much to the chagrin of his brother, Alex got a nice 37.3 from Mike Evans. David Montgomery also had a nice week.
What a week for fantasy! Rockin’ and rollin’ and whatnot. What happened outside the football world on this historical day you ask? Thanks to Jack for sending me a link to a website that just lists things that happened each day. For some reason they didn’t include the start of Must Be Sunday, so take it with a grain of salt or whatever the phrase is I’m not even totally sure. There seemed to be a lot of news about ISIS, so that probably wasn’t good. Game 5 of the World Series took place that night. The Astros beat the Nationals 7-1 to take a 3-2 series lead. Thankfully, they would go on to lose the series to the Nationals. Soon-to-be Yankee Ace Gerrit Cole went 7 strong striking out 9.
Seriously, what a fun two years it’s been. Alex and Lebron are out, Brad and Thomas are in, but The League itself remains the same. Let’s see how different the NFL and fantasy football is two years from now. One thing I know for sure is Robby Anderson will be on my team and he will have just given me 6.3 points. He is going to turn me into the Joker. “That’s lifeee.”
Must Be Sunday: 2019 – infinity. Go League!
There comes a time in every man’s life when they have to block out the haters. In my case, this is a frequent occurance.
Recently, a lot of hate has been thrown my way for deciding to consistently start Chargers’ WR Mike Williams.
Sure, the 26-year-old isn’t Cooper Kupp or Tyreek Hill, but those guys weren’t available anyway.
In any case, the hosts of the “well known” League Talk podcast have constantly questioned the decision to start the Los Angeles flanker. Did they have reason to? Perhaps. Have I proved them wrong? Indeed.
In three weeks of fantasy action, Mike Williams has been on a tear (18.2 week 1, 18.6 week 2, 29.7 week 3). For those with limited math skills, that’s an average of 22.1 points per week. According to ESPN, that makes Williams the second highest scoring wide receiver in all of football. Look it up, it’s true.
Well who cares about individual stats if you’re losing? Likely no one. But I’m no loser.
After a brutal loss to Thomas & Friends, I had to face the league’s most feared team — HockeyPro 69 (or something like that). Again, most predicted I would fall to the mighty Abie. Again, they were wrong. With a little help from Mike Williams, Waller Nothing took this one 141.64 to 106.9. Not even close.
As the great Michael Jordan once said, “I’m back.”
You know that song “The Boys are Back in Town?” Of course you do. Whatever band wrote that song wrote it about The League. Thin Lizzy or something like that. I’m not going to look it up. We doing it live!
The League is back and it’s back in a big way. Ten teams, half PPR, one QB. Fantasy played the right way.
You know that song that goes like, “I’mmmmmm goinggggg throughhh chaaaaaangeees?” Of course you do. We all got a new president, some got new apartments, I got a new pair of shoes and The League got some some new members. Welcome to the show Brad and Bonez. Prime time. Rest in Peace Alex and Lebron. Alex informed us of his decision to leave pretty early into last season. While he did leave the group me he did stay true to his word on finishing out the season. Class move. He’s moving to North Carolina pretty soon, so it all sort of worked out anyway. I think his reason behind his choice to leave was he didn’t enjoy that fantasy made it impossible for him to enjoy football. I get it, Alex. Conversely, Lebron bowed out slightly less gracefully. You likely all recall the Taysom Hill debacle of 2020. I imagine ESPN’s handling of this situation led to fights in every fantasy league. Combine that with some other house keeping arguments the kid left midseason. We just straight up played with nine teams last year. Probably the most chaotic part of 2020.
You know that song that’s like, “we ain’t going no where, we can’t be stopped now, cause it’s bad boy for life?” You probably do. It’s a really, really good song. I had a nice rebound last year from a somewhat disastrous 2019. Second place. Not bad. A lot of other people would’ve killed for silver. Not me. I wanted the gold. I wanted it bad. I was full McKayla Maroney after championship week. Brent turned his team into a juggernaut due to some unruly trades. I knew it was going to be tough. I don’t want to paint myself as some great underdog story. It’s me after all. Ryan was our Cinderella story last year. Still, I was severely under matched. It was close but you know what they say about things that are close. You make an ass out of me. No excuses. I’ve been putting in the work doing mocks and doing some pretty intense research. I also have the first pick. I’ve never been so confident going into a season. It’s Beans Corp for life.
You know that song that goes like, “I have died every day waiting for you
Darling, don’t be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years,
I’ll love you for a thousand more.” If you know me you know that song makes me cry on sight every single time no matter the time, place or situation. It’s because it reminds me about how I feel about The League and all that comes with it. The people, the yelling, the wings, the chips, the yelling, the comradery and the yelling. Oh, and the content. I love the content. The blog and the pod. Last year I couldn’t keep up with it nearly as much as I wished. Work was nuts. I think I only wrote three or four Look Back At Its. We probably podded only a little bit more than that. To be fair, later in the season it got straight up unsafe for Andrew and I to be in the same room within a proximity close enough to record a podcast. Regardless, barring any unforeseen circumstances within the next few months I am full steam ahead. Bloggin, poddin and mobbin.
The draft order is set. The mocks have commenced. The air fryer is heating up.
The League forever.
I’m back……
you’re all fucked.
This right here is a Declaration of War to 3 teams I will be playing in the upcoming weeks. When the teams I’m talking about read this we are NOT friends anymore just know you’re the ENEMY.
First, I want to talk about the worst team in the league and the one I will be playing this week. Marzy and Me the team that doesn’t even deserve to hold the belt he “wOn” with the way he has been preforming. This is a man who named his team after the manager of last years worst team in the league it’s no wonder his team is so bad. Him and his QB Jared Goff have a lot in common they’re both barely good enough to stay in the league. I am going to dismantle and destroy this team that can barely put together a 100 points in the first 2 weeks. And I’ll do that without even having my best players in my starting lineup.
On to the next team, HOCKEYPRO 69 gosh to talk shit about this team won’t even take much. Let’s start with the fact that the only two wins Abie has is against the two MOST bottom tier teams in the league. One of those teams I already shit on in the paragraph above and the other is Ryan who we just ironed out the punishment for being in last place in the previous year…enough said. Abie I like you but guess what? I don’t like you. Playing this guy who wont get that same breakout performance from Aaron Jones he got on his first win is going to make this a cake walk. This is going to be like last year when I beat Brent and proved that he wasn’t top tier.
Now I’ll prove Abie’s team ain’t shit either…
Speaking of Brent aka The Flandrew’s the king of not being top tier I can’t wait to see you in week 6 when my whole team is back healthy and ready to absolutely DEMOLISH your scrub team. Last week, when we played each other not only did you get lucky but I didn’t even have McCaffrey. Should have been a win for me but as we all know shoulda coulda woulda. Our game had you sweating and you know it! This is going to be the game of the season and an absolute grudge match. The best revenge match you’ve ever seen.
I can’t wait to prove that Brent isn’t top tier, will never be top tier and has NEVER BEEN TOP TIER!
To everyone reading this going “oH hE iS 0 aNd 3 He Is TrAsH.”
Just know I’m coming for you next…
In the words of Micheal Jordan
“I’m Back”
-Andrew J. Lebron
Last Year’s Runner up and This Year’s Future Champion
If you know anything about me, then you know I love 3 things: crushing beers, getting chicks and dominating our fantasy league. Sadly, I’m not doing much of either of the last two, and I have only myself to blame.
Based off my performance the last 2 seasons, I’ve come to expect nothing short of greatness from myself. I think we all have, which is why its both humbling to see my team at the bottom of the standings among the likes of Ryan, Abie and Jack. And its not like I’ve just been unlucky and performed well but gotten beat cause my opponent went apeshit. m]My team is just plain bad top to bottom. Derrick Henry? Why don’t you score a td for once. Carson Wentz? What was I thinking? Todd Gurley? Nightmare. I could go on an on but you get the idea.
Where did it all go wrong? Did I do something to upset the Fantasy Football Gods? Was it a lack of mock drafts? Did two years of dominance go to my head? In the fantasy world, it was like I was playing Madden with the sliders all the way up and autotrades on. Oh shit, Saquon Barkley is on a bye? No problem, I’ll just pick up Ronald Jones on the waiver wire and have him drop 35. It was too easy. I pushed every right button. I mean usually I wake up on Sunday morning, check my ESPN app, and I already have been given the win.
To say I’m displeased with my teams performance doesn’t even do it justice. I life, breath and die with The League. Everything I do is with my eyes on the prize, the coveted Fantasy Belt (which if you need reminding is currently in possession). I don’t even care about the prize money. Seriously, I’ll donate it this year if I win. I just want to hold that belt over all your heads–gloating in my victory– cause I know all y’all would to the same.
So allow me to quote the immortal Mets OF Tim Tebow, “You will never see a Fantasy Owner in the entire country play as hard as I will play the rest of the season, and you will never see someone push the rest of their fantasy team as hard as I will push everybody the rest of the season, and you will never see a fantasy team play harder that we will the rest of the season”. I’m pledging to be better, and in the end I am going to take home what’s rightfully mine. I promise you that.
God bless.
Well boys, the big day finally came and went. I am still hungover. The booze flowed, wings were crushed, Kareem Hunt went wayyy earlier than he probably should have, and Lebron actually bit me. There were winners, there were losers and then there was one draft strategy that was so bizarre that Dave Gettleman couldn’t have picked a worse team even if he tried (I kid, he probably can). Anyway, as the defending champion, I’m sure the world waits with bated breath for my thoughts on what went down Saturday, so without further hesitation, let’s get into it!
First, let’s discuss the winners of this years draft. As always, the Usual Suspects came away looking like they’re gonna dominate this years regular season. Not only do me, Kris and Brent all look really strong in front of the mirror section at your local Retro Fitness, but our drafts look equally strong on paper. Sorry Kris, but I had to swoop in and steal Todd Gurley at the beginning of the 4th Round, but I’m sure you weren’t too upset because you still had a hard on after your first three picks (SaQuads, D-Hop and Davante Adams if you need a refresher). After all the shit talk that spewed from Brent’s mouth last year saying “Top tier this… top tier that, etc.”, it seems Brent came in on a mission to ensure his team reached its top tier potential. Zeke, Julio, Chris Carson, Melvin Gordon and Keenan Allen is as top a top 5 as you’ll find out there. Will Brent finish top tier? Probably not if we’re being honest, but I think he put himself in a great position to at least not finish last.
But just as there are obvious winners in every draft, there were some obvious losers, and I have to begin with my man Marzy. Great kid, love the guy, but he drafts like a Helen Keller driving a bus full of orphaned school children, in other words a complete disaster. I simply have no words for taking 6 straight WRs in rounds 3-8, especially after your top two picks have some heavy question marks at the RB position. We all know Joe Mixon stinks and CEH is an unproven rookie back in a pass heavy offense. Also he did the Taysom Hill thing again. Ryan, I hope you prove me wrong, but I’d start prepping for another shitty punishment (TBD).
The only other obvious loser in this draft, I hate to say, is my guy Lebron. I mean Chris Godwin over Davante Adams? Eh don’t love it. James Conner over Davante Adams, what are you stupid? Not only that, but a backup Kareem Hunt in the fourth round when there were other teams RB1’s still on the board was not a great move. Those three picks certainly raised some eyebrows and I hope don’t come back to bite you in the ass. Well actually I do since you proceeded to bite me on the neck later in the evening in the midst of a global pandemic.
I want to quickly touch upon the drafts of the remaining owners in The League that haven’t already been mentioned. Beans, Dalvin Cook’s injury history scares me (which is why I went Derrick Henry over him in round 1), but if he stays healthy, Dalvin and Nick Chubb offer a hell of a RB duo. Almost the exact same thing can be said about Abie’s top 2 picks, Kenyan Drake and Aaron Jones. Kenyan Drake’s relatively unpredictability (only having played a handful of games in Arizona’s Air Raid offense) and Aaron Jones TD dependency last year both raised some red flags, but they too can really offer a strong 1-2 RB duo. Alex, you know I’m a guy who loves RBs early and often, and for that reason I was not a fan of Travis Kelce with the first pick of the 2nd round, but I can understand why he would be an attractive pick. Hope it works out for ya. Everyone had already penciled in Jack taking Zeke with the 3rd overall pick, so the real first upset of the day came when he took the other OSU golden boy Mikey Thomas with his first round pick. Lots of other former Buckeyes found there way onto Jack’s team, so I hope he knows what he was doing.
Last, but certainly not least is the only minor celebrity among our ownership group, Maxwell Cohen. Max, a huge round of applause for joining us virtually for the big day and conducting a rather smooth draft from the Deep South (unlike the Lebron disaster from the year prior), so kudos to you. All I have to say is you took Sammy Watkins so you’re team automatically stinks, but Kamara and Tyreek Hill aren’t bad I guess.
Well, that about wraps it up. Excuse me while I scour the waiver wire looking for a new kicker cause fucking Matt Gay got sacked yesterday. Can’t wait to do what we do best and scream about how Ronald Jones is ruining our lives every 5 minutes come Sunday. Commish out.
Must Be Sunday 